|
The reason we're here
Why I'm here
As you're browsing through this site, you might be wondering about who I am and why I'm doing all of this?
I think that I probably have been unconciously working on this family history project all of my life and just didn't realize it until recent years! I spent my childhood immersed in stories, recollections about my family's past and visits with various assorted older relatives. I was in the unique position of being for the most part, the youngest child of all the relatives on both sides of my family, with the majority of the numerous cousins being much older than me.
My early childhood was spent going with my parents to visit all of the numerous older relatives and attending various funerals of distant relatives whom I had never met. My parents never once thought of getting a babysitter for me, so I learned early on to tag along, stay quietly in the background and absorb all of the conversations going on around me and over my head like a little sponge. I was often surrounded by generations far removed from my own and quickly developed an interest and passion for the history around me. This childhood also created within me an appreciation and respect for those older generations that made up my small world.
It wasn't until after I grew up, left home and had my own children though that I suddenly looked around and realized how few of those relatives and that history was left. As a child, of course I never questioned or thought of the possibility that that history would one day disappear or fade away? I never realized how much our family had drifted apart due to those older generations being gone, and the families being spread out across the country. I also didn't understand or realize back then how many things were left unsaid, untalked about, unmentioned, how many gaps and questions there were left un-accounted for because of the unwritten rule of not discussing or talking about them. How many secrets and reasons there were for many of those families drifting away.
It wasn't until after my Father passed away and my Mother's health and memory started to fade that I began to really understand and realize how much of our family and our history had disappeared or become lost to us over the years. I found myself wondering and curious about all of those missing people in our family and intrigued by many of the puzzles and mysteries surrounding the family.
I've always been interested in history and passed that interest on to my daughter at a very early age. When we firsted started our family research, it was more out of curiosity and a desire to learn more about our local area and family history. It began as sort of a family hobby that we could enjoy doing together, learn a little more about history along the way, and something that we could involve my Mother in.
It very quickly, however, took on a life of it's own and taught us far more lessons about life and family than we could ever have anticipated. During the early stages of the project, my Mother's health was fading rapidly and the project took on a whole new meaning and importance for us as well as a sense of urgancy and almost desperation on her part to remember as much as possible, share it, and help find answers to questions that had haunted and bothered her for many years. I think she knew long before the rest of us just how sick she really was, how little time she had remaining and wanted to be sure she had shared everything possible, answered every question, found every missing person before she passed away.
What followed was a year of her opening up and sharing as much as she could of hers and my Father's pasts and memories. A year of becoming much closer to my Mother whom I had always had difficulty in getting along with or understanding. It was a year of learning and understanding just how much the past influences and affects who we are now and who we raise our children to be in the future. It was a year of connecting with my Mother, not as a Mother, but as a person, one who had a life before she became my Mother. It was a year of bonding all of those past generations together and sending them on through the future through my daughter.
That year of learning and sharing with my Mother and my daughter has inspired me to continue on with the research, continue searching for answers to all of those questions. It also left me with a sense of purpose, a need and a desire to share it with all of the other family members who might be searching for those lost and quickly disappearing connections as well. It left me with a need to help answer some of the questions that so many others in our family are probably asking themselves or wondering about. I am hoping too that some how or some way, some of the missing family members who may be in serious need of some of these answers for their own peace of mind will eventually find their way here.
My Mother was for most of her life, the keeper and care taker of her family's memories and secrets. She was the connection and the bond that held a fragile family together and she held on to the family's often painful memories and secret until the very last when she finally realized that maybe it was doing more harm now than good. She seemed to come to the conclusion that the past needed to be opened and shared, and somewhow, the future generations needed to know about the past in order to go on with the future.
This site is my way of granting her those last wishes of trying to reconnect and put the families back together in some way. It's my way of helping her give some of those, who might be out there on their own, a family, a sense of past, and way of going on to the future with a history and legacy to learn from. One of her last thoughts on all of the missing family members out there were that they needed to know that they were never forgotten, uncared about or unloved. She knew there were many relatives out there who very likely knew nothing of their family, their heritage, but that all of them were constantly in her thoughts. During her last year of life as she was reconnected in some way with those relatives, she would be filled with excitement, wonder and awe, pride and relief that another one had been returned to her. Her face would light up, tears would come to her eyes as in her own small way in her heart; she weclomed them home, told them, even if they weren't around to hear her, that she loved them, she missed having them in her life and that she was sorry they couldn't have spent time together or known each other.
So, to all of the many missing relatives who never got the chance to know our family, this site is for you to come home to now, to finally get to know us and the history we all share.
A little about me and my immediate family
I am Judith Ann Workman, the daughter of Ward Harlan Workman and Florence Estelle Driver. I was born in 1957 in Ely, MN and raised in a small isolated mining town in northern Minnesota. Most of my childhood was filled with visiting relatives in the Brainerd, MN area, where many of my parent's families remained.
After I graduated from high school, I left Minnesota and my family for a number of years while I was in the Air Force. When my children were small, I came home to raise them near their Grandparents and give them a chance and opportunity to grow up surrounded by family as I was when I was young. I have been a single parent from the very beginning and my parents were there every step of the way, helping us and supporting us emotionally as we struggled through all of the difficulties of family life. I think one of the greatest gifts or blessings I was able to give my children was the oppurtunity and experience of being able to know their Grandparents, to share and learn from them, to feel their love all around them for the time they had with them.
My children are almost grown now, I say almost for a number of reasons; First, I probably hate to admit they're growing up and away from me; I think too that they never really grow up in our eyes, or in their own perceptions of how they interact and deal with us as opposed to the rest of the world.
My daughter Dorissa Suzanne is 21 now and living in Ohio going to college. My sense of family and history played an important part in naming her when she was born. She is named after my Grandmothers, Dora Workman, and Susanna Driver, and she seems to have inherited those feelings about history and family. She has helped from the very beginning on the family research and is majoring in history.
My son, Ryan Marcus Alfaro, is 18 and right now his most pressing concern and interest is in just getting finished with high school! He isn't quite sure yet where his future will take him and isn't too interested in family history yet. At the present time he is more interested in his music.
I spent a number of years teaching pre-school, working with high risk children. As my own children grew though and my parent's health started failing, I needed to find a job that was a little more flexible and not quite so stressful on top of the family stress. I've been working with elderly nursing home residents for a few years now, and can honestly say it's one of the most emotionally rewarding experiences I've ever had.
I have been working on this family history/research for past seven years and it has become, at many times, a second full time job. I am hoping eventually to take some classes in Genealogy research and to work on it more in depth in the future. My ultimate goal is to one day be able to document and share all of our history and memories in a book about our families.
News and future plans for our family
It took me much longer than I ever thought or realized to get through the loss of my Mom, Florence. The past few years have been a very difficult process of working through all of it and learning how to go on without her or my Dad in my life. I will readily admit that over the past two years, I experienced a huge emotional melt down! Maybe it was a combination of losing Mom, and then quickly after that, having my daughter/ best friend suddenly grow up so fast and fly out of the nest so far away from me! It was pretty rough to get through, but over past 6 months, I think I've finally begun to emerge and go on with the help of my kids, and a very special and understanding man!
The past few months have brought a number of massive changes for me and life is pretty busy and hectic right now getting used to and ready for more changes! Dorie is busy with her schooling, her work and her life in Ohio with only occasional stays at home now. She will be home in May for one last summer to spend here with the family. Ryan is getting ready to graduate and knows only that he really wants to do something involving music.... Hmmmm I think he got in the wrong family branch? Since our particular branch is basically tone deaf, can't carry a note, have inherited no musical talent what so ever! Anyway, his only interest and highest priority right now is getting another bass guitar and getting out there to be part of a band somewhere!
My life is about to change in another way besides the kids growing up and moving on- as if that's not enough of a huge change to get used to! I am planning on a move to Southern Minnesota some time this summer to Truman, MN where my boyfriend is living now. And, although we've been experiencing a few stressful and frustrating delays and changes in plans, we are still hoping to get everything straightened out and taken care of so that we can have a wedding somewhere in the near future!
Email Me!
E-mail me at
Links to Other Sites
My Links
|
